Recently, I ruminated in an email that perhaps I’d lived in Asia too long.
I was concerned to avoid an entirely “cold call” when writing to someone known to my correspondent and it crossed my mind to wonder if he might think I was being a bit too indirect.
Subsequently I chanced upon this magnificent piece on the British by Theodore Dalrymple, a writer whose entire output I would happily take on subscription. I particularly enjoyed this
The habit of indirection in speech, combined with probity of action, gave English life its savor and its interest. Mayer provided a brief interpretive key for the unwary:
I may be wrong—I am absolutely sure.
I don’t know much about—I am a specialist in.
No trouble at all—What a burden!
We must keep in touch—Good-bye forever.
Must you go?—At last!
Not too bad—Absolutely wonderful
One of my more memorable vignettes of British tact and diplomacy occurred after my first Christmas dinner with my prospective in-laws
Future mother-in-law, speaking from outside the kitchen:
Wasn’t it good wine?!
Future brother-in-law (resident of France), with enthusiasm, as he poured his down the kitchen sink:
Yes it was; absolutely delicious!!
The contrast between word and deed caused me to laugh out loud. It took the beau-frère a second to realise why, then he grinned a little sheepisly. I think in my own family there’d have been an immediate, i.e., at the dinner table,
Urgh! Where did THIS come from?!
I can see the merit of both propensities.
My future in laws professed that I’d be a fine addition to the family. The other mother-in-law made it clear that civilisation had come to an end!
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Thanks, I’ve spent 2 days computer time (=10 mins) hunting for this article – our am-dram director is American and tearing her hair out – “but they said it would be nice – why is no-one here”?
I’ve been in the UK too long. I say Thank you about 20 times between meeting and parting from someone new.
Seriously, WTF am I so grateful about?